Athena Timarie entered our world on August 29, 2022 and life has never been the same. We have been living in sleep-deprived bliss. V is the best big sister. Toward the end of my maternity leave, I looked at both girls and my heart cried out that it needed more time. I remember how hard … Continue reading
Giant bold disclaimer: Of course, I need to start out by saying that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to getting pregnant at an “advanced maternal age,” and that I what I did of course won’t work for everyone. This is simply my story of how we overcame “secondary infertility” at age 39 and went on … Continue reading
Lately, a lot more of you have been commenting, which I love. I love to hear from you. And my heart is just absolutely been going out to those of you who are having a terrible time during such a terrible time. This is a horrible time to lose someone, to be jobless, to be … Continue reading
I got the call today. My hands shook, my voice caught, and the tears flowed. A treasured time in my life is ending, and something new will begin. I discovered recently that I am not so good at endings, nor beginnings. (That makes up a lot of life, so that’s probably not good.) I get … Continue reading
(These. Photos. Am I right?! I saw them on Tumblr and felt a jolt of recognition, and of course, they were taken in Fukushima.) I’ve been in a dreamy haze, writing a lot on my own. I told C today that as I start to write more, by myself on a real computer, and not … Continue reading
We had a small, slow Christmas Eve around here. V and I woke up around 8:15 and just hung out this morning; she drew pictures with her new easel that her nanny got her and I read bits of books and just watched her. This afternoon I recognized that I was feeling a little blue, … Continue reading
Not tonight, Josephine I was reading Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng a few weeks ago (my favorite book this year), and there’s a part where Izzy, an angry teenage character, shuts herself in her room and listens to Tori Amos over and over, the darkness of it opening her up, allowing her to confront … Continue reading
I’m getting sick, everyone says. Except that it’s not like that, not really. Yesterday, at 4:54pm, we were in the car. I’d felt great all day. V had been sick, and James as well, but I’ve been fortunate and haven’t gotten sick once since summer. One could even say I was getting a little cocky … Continue reading
I don’t like myself when my kid takes forever falling asleep and I’m short as hell and snippy with her. She can’t control when she falls asleep. (But God, if she could!) I don’t like myself when I overbook my days and even a reasonable family visit feels like a burden. I don’t like myself … Continue reading
In the library bathroom today, the smell hit me even before the door was fully open. At the sink, a homeless woman was brushing her teeth. I slid past her, avoiding her gaze, V in tow. While in the stall, V counted squares of tile on the floor, all while I murmured, That’s great, and, … Continue reading
small life, slow life 