Then, I thought the breakup was a series of mistakes that I made that I could have corrected if history had arranged itself differently.For months I went over the days leading up to the breakup, analyzing every word we spoke to each other, dissecting the fights that had been increasing in frequency. It felt like … Continue reading
A really close friend just recently went through an earth-shattering, out-of-the-blue breakup. It happened on a Friday and she called me on Saturday morning. “I read your blog,” she said tearfully.“Oh geez, don’t do that!” I said, feeling like those blogs from so long ago couldn’t possibly help anyone now. It made me think about … Continue reading
I remember looking at my computer screen, the letter from Berkeley announcing my acceptance, glaring at me in black and white. We are pleased to inform you. “Aren’t you happy?!” Other Mom said, shaking my shoulders. “Get excited!” Another memory: Eighth grade graduation, crying my eyes out, thinking of saying goodbye to a temporary boyfriend, … Continue reading
Sometimes, the answer to being so tired and crazy is to spend the day with these two guys, and have a damn margarita with dinner and laugh your head off. At least, tonight, that was the answer for me. V woke up ten million at least nine times last night. Today I found out that … Continue reading
What could it look like to just soften? What could it be like to not watch myself in the mirror, to not look for skin pudge-ing out over my bra, or hanging over the waistband? How could life be without saying to myself, Well, before I had a baby, I looked like ________ / I weighed … Continue reading
I’m not the same girl who was so haunted by C leaving. Yesterday, I took V to a restaurant for a quick lunch. I fussed around ordering, getting her settled and into a high chair. I didn’t even think about it until we were seated outside with our food. Oh yeah. I used to come … Continue reading
I’m currently reading book 26 of my “Read 30 books in 2018 even though I have a kid challenge” (lol) and it’s The Art of Hearing Heartbeats by Jan-Philipp Sendker. First of all, I’m not even halfway through, and I can already tell that this is one of those beautiful books that is going to … Continue reading
Today we said goodbye to Sophie, our ten year-old mini schnauzer. It was a really difficult decision my mom and I made together after considering the amount Sophie was suffering, and the amount she’s suffered her whole life. Being in the presence of someone/something who dies isn’t something I’ve done a lot in my life, … Continue reading
Let me back up. I was having breakfast with a dear friend this morning who has known me a long, long time. She knows all about this blog and about all of you, of course. We were talking about our lives, relationships, careers and the future. And suddenly, I just said out loud what I’ve … Continue reading
Today is October 15th. Five years ago, I came home from work, and as C trimmed his toenails (true story), I said I still didn’t feel like things were okay between us, and he agreed. I never imagined what he’d finally work up to say just twenty minutes later. “I think I need to be … Continue reading
