small life, slow life

When I started the goal of blogging 100 days in a row, I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.

But ten days in, I was like, Holy shit — how am I ever going to make it to 100? It was a much bigger goal than I originally anticipated. It takes a lot more effort than bopping out a couple of cutesy sentences on my phone.

I am also learning so much. Mainly, that perfect truly is the enemy of the good. For years I have let this blog sit here, dusty, because I wanted to have the “perfect” thing to say to you. But the truth is, whether very few people are looking at this blog because I’m writing mediocre posts, or zero people are looking because I’m not writing any posts at all doesn’t actually matter to me — what DOES matter to me is that I am writing. It may not be perfect. There are typos for sure. It may not get 800+ comments like How I Got My Ex Back. (And you know what cracks me up? People still message me, to this day, about this mason jar post, asking me these really detailed questions. And I want to be like, “Hey guys, so I only made those once, so you are truly as much of an expert as I am!”) Anyway, I have already learned that crappy writing > not writing at all.

I am also learning, daily, that by working full time and having a marriage and a two year-old, that I also can’t create my ideal writing situation. I am not at a desk or in a cafe with beautiful music in my ears, sipping a warm drink and dreaming about what I should write. I am writing half sentences and bullet points while V squiggles all over my lap or during a ten minute break at work or while my husband is trying to tell me something. And so if something remotely coherent comes out, great. It is maddening to have the tiny scraps of time that I do and nothing more. But again, I go back to — If I wasn’t doing this now, then I wouldn’t be doing it at all. If I wait for blocks of free time or the perfect inspiration, it is never going to happen. Whereas if I cultivate this daily writing habit, something will absolutely come of it.

The other perk to writing everyday is the one I had hoped to regain the most — I am noticing my life more. I notice the just-perfect way the sun hits V’s hair on our evening walk. A conversation I have in passing creates a reason to think more deeply. I am always asking myself, What will the blog be about today? And that simple question has woken me up to being more present in many more of the moments.

Seth Godin, in a speech I had the pleasure of hearing in 2015, said that the most important thing he ever did was to cultivate a daily writing habit on his blog. I never in a million years though I would do something like that, but it always stuck with me for some reason.

There are fifty more blogs to go, and I’m not going to lie, that really seems like a lot right now. But I am really excited to complete this goal and see where it leads. And if you’ve stuck with me this far…that is nothing short of amazing. Thank you.