I went gluten-free 11(ish?) years ago. I’m not allergic, I just feel better when I don’t eat it — less bloated, no cystic acne, etc. I have been eating it while pregnant, because…I’m pregnant? And anything goes right now. One of the things that C and I have always had in common is a desire … Continue reading
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How I got pregnant naturally a month before I turned 40.
Giant bold disclaimer: Of course, I need to start out by saying that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to getting pregnant at an “advanced maternal age,” and that I what I did of course won’t work for everyone. This is simply my story of how we overcame “secondary infertility” at age 39 and went on … Continue reading
It’s a terrible time to be having a terrible time.
Lately, a lot more of you have been commenting, which I love. I love to hear from you. And my heart is just absolutely been going out to those of you who are having a terrible time during such a terrible time. This is a horrible time to lose someone, to be jobless, to be … Continue reading
Face it.
I see the discarded pregnancy tests in the trash as I toss in a tampon wrapper. These unlikely plastic adversaries sit beside each other: one a symbol of hope, the other of failure. Immediately, I think, Ugh, I’ll take the trash out so I don’t have to look at those. Then, correcting myself, I think, … Continue reading
A small & slow holiday season.
We’re at the very end of December, arguably my favorite time of year. The special padding of time between Christmas and New Year’s always feels like a bonus week that moves extra slow. I really savor it. I spent most of December working & baking. I really thought this holiday season would be different because … Continue reading
All of this means nothing.
I’ve been playing one song so much that V has begun requesting it. “Mommy, wanna hear ‘Handbreaker’.” (The song is called “Dealbreaker.”) When I’m alone in my car, it’s the first place I go. I find the vein (turn it up), insert the blade (let the words remind me), and sigh with relief as the … Continue reading
Small Life, Slow Life: It took a fire.
You might have heard that fires are raging through Southern California again. While they aren’t close to us this time, the wind blew all of the smoke and ash here, and, long story short, both C’s gym and my store have been closed for two days due to poor air quality. And it’s not like … Continue reading
Small Life, Slow Life: Experiences over things.
(Don’t worry, this isn’t turning into a Disneyland blog.) I had the best time with V at Disneyland last week, and ever since I’ve been talking to all of my coworkers about buying an annual pass. “But the cost,” I moaned. “And even if you get the cheaper pass, parking is $25 per trip. So … Continue reading
Small Life, Slow Life: A Special Mom & Daughter Disney Date!
I was gone on a work trip last week, and V had a really hard time with me being away. On Sunday night, I said to C, “I think I’ll take her to Disneyland tomorrow.” “Really?” he said. “By yourself? Isn’t it super expensive?” “She’s only free a little while longer.” As luck would have … Continue reading
Small Life, Slow Life: Evaporating Color.
The truth is, since I stepped into my new role, I haven’t written a single word. (Well, that is, other than work emails and business recaps and community plans.) I did all that work last year clearing out the channel, scrubbing off the rust and corrosion, wrote 100 days in a row and then some…and … Continue reading